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Tuesday, December 28, 2021

MAGA world rages after Ivanka caves and succumbs to the Fauci ouchie

WASHINGTON, DC - AUGUST 27: Ivanka Trump, daughter of U.S. President Donald Trump and White House senior adviser, addresses attendees as Trump prepares to deliver his acceptance speech for the Republican presidential nomination on the South Lawn of the White House August 27, 2020 in Washington, DC. Trump is scheduled to deliver the speech in front of 1500 invited guests.  (Photo by Chip Somodevilla/Getty Images)
"Accept the vaccine, plebs! Your queen demands an Illuminati sacrifice!"

Ivanka Trump has spent the past five years trying to position herself in the public’s mind as the “reasonable” Trump. Granted, that's a pretty low bar. All she really needed to do is show up as “warm-blooded” on infrared surveillance cameras, and she was basically there. Another useful tactic? Avoid appearing on video every 10 minutes, like the unofficial spokesperson for pure Colombian cocaine.

No, for Ivanka, the trick is to tacitly endorse every horrible thing her father does. She stood around cow-eyed and mute while the country unraveled, only to then gurgle pro-civilization shibboleths like “we need better child care” and “let’s all get the vaccine” to make it seem like her dad didn’t just spend the past half-decade menacing the nation like an aimless Macy’s Angry Birds balloon with explosive diarrhea.

The problem for Ivanka, though, is that MAGA devotees aren’t much interested in civilization—or at least the parts where we pass laws for the common good, do our civic duty by paying our taxes and vaccinating ourselves and our children, and accept the results of free and fair elections. The parts of civilization that produced at least 10 discrete varieties of Bud Light? Now you’re talking.

And so the reaction to Ivanka’s Wednesday announcement on Instagram and Twitter that she got the COVID-19 shot was fairly predictable.

This seemingly benign act—which, I’m old enough to recall, would have been seen as the one and only responsible adult choice 30 or so years ago—was straight-up savaged by the MAGA mob.

Now, given that at least 12 chromosomes in the Trump genome are devoted exclusively to evil, you have to give Ivanka some credit for doing the right thing. If only her “fans” agreed.

Instagram was a particular cesspool of disinformation and hate. You can click through to view the backlash in its red-hatted entirety, but here’s a representative sample.

tash_poonka

No thank you! I have immune system for a reason.

Because of the 99.8% survival rate of a virus they’ve never identified? Anthony Fauci and Andrew Cuomo would be proud.

kenny_vv

Hell no. Why would you post this?

rmgvd

Bummer. I was hoping you were above this kind of virtue signaling.

sk_oksana

Nope. I don’t trust you people. Never had flu shots and NEVER I will give my body to experiment on me... No No No

katherineljackson

Hell no. Quit telling perfectly healthy people to take this so called "vaccine".

mark.anthony.35110418

Unfollowed

I hope you support freedom of choice for vaccines.

Yeah, they’re almost all like that. It’s astounding, really. Maybe she should have specified that she asked for the vaccine without the preinstalled copy of Windows Vista.

The Trumps now find themselves on the horns of a dilemma. One horn is that the vaccines were developed while Trump was president, and he desperately wants to take credit for them. The other is that Trump’s popularity lives and dies based on the conspiracy theories he regularly nurtures, and that’s the horn that may end up gouging not just him but his throngs of addlepated fans as well.

And there’s nothing Ivanka can do to unravel that mess now. She had numerous chances to do the “responsible” thing, and yet Donald Trump was never once locked in a closet all that time he was terrorizing us.

So thanks for getting the shot, Vanky, but this is still a big fail. 

Today, I got the shot!!! I hope that you do too! Thank you Nurse Torres!!! 
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You could have told people that covid wasn’t a “dem hoax”. You could have told people Covid wasn’t going to “disappear like a miracle”, or with the “warmer weather.” You could’ve helped stop hundreds of thousands of American deaths but you didn’t. You didn’t. So you’re too late.

Too late, indeed.

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