An ode to aging we can all relate to

(Frank Sullivan is a former All Star pitcher for the Boston Red Sox and a friend of Gazette Columnist Noble Collins. He was a teammate of the revered Ted Williams, among others. Frank has an engaging writing style and has experienced far more adventures than baseball alone. In coming weeks it will be a pleasure to share his many ups and downs with Gazette Blog readers.)

I asked an older friend once, “When will I know I am old?” He said it was easy to tell by spitting. He said, “When you are young you spit over your chin, and when you are old, you spit all over it.”

I don’t do a lot of spitting these days because of that test but I am here to tell you getting old is sure getting old. But of all things, I find it more interesting that I thought it would be. It ain’t all good, but it is interesting.

After what I consider to be one of the most exciting and rewarding travels on this earth, I am not ashamed to say, “I damn near did it all.” And I did it during a time when unthinkable things happened. Surely, the past 82 years were some of the most incredible gains in man’s ability to make dreams a reality. Walk on the moon! Satellite television and global positioning systems that tell us how to get where we want to go. Dick Tracy wristwatches can’t hold a candle to what we carry around everyday like it was supposed to happen. It goes on and on. I mean the only thing old I am still stuck with is my handy old toilet plunger and me. The plunger doesn’t look like it will make another day, but I intend to give the year a go despite the trauma of losing the plunger and all the good times we had together.

It’s interesting to try and remember all the times I stood on the mound and said to myself, “This is the moment the game will change unless you shut them down!” And now needing that same resolve I find myself running a quart low on self discipline and I am running a quart low on effort. There is this sort of melancholy feeling that comes over me every late afternoon suggesting I didn’t try hard enough to make the day better. Lord knows it’s true, but I don’t seem to have the will to make it better.

I shrug it off a lot because having only one eye and no depth perception limits what I can do physically to a great extent, but I am easily steered off a project with that one thought. I even allow myself to think, “You’re old! What do you expect?” One excuse after another and the next thing I know is my night time raid on the refrigerator has me into the strawberries instead of a drink of cold water.

The nights are incredibly interesting with the dreams. The menu lists good and bad but I am never allowed a choice. After a good dream the morning is much more palatable than after a bad one as can be expected, but the ones where I am wanting to get word to my mother and father that I am trying to get home and can never remember the phone number is hard to swallow. I’m sure it is the result of my time in the military and the following years of being a baseball player in the summer and a boatman in the winter and having the time of my life doing it. But I always felt slightly guilty about not being home for them and my sister Carol.

I think it is interesting that I have found that waking in the night, other than for needed bladder relief, requires a steadfast drill of getting out of the bed and coming here on the computer before the train of thought gets on a bad track. Funny how that bad track will drag you down to the extent you feel all is lost until the first light of dawn and, upon getting up, it’s all gone! It’s as if I just spent a big chunk of my life for nothing? I just ruined a good night with negative thoughts? So it’s up and out of the sack if my brain snaps awake in the night as it is wont to do.

I find it also interesting that I was talked into allowing a publisher to make a book out of some of my writings by the publisher himself. I find it interesting everyone that has read it seems to be pleased with it but I can’t seem to sell it in the east where I thought it would be at least a nice Christmas gift to a snow bound Red Sox baseball fan.

And how come I get so much pleasure from writing, especially since I was such a lousy English student.

Interesting too is my absolute need to have something to look forward to start the next day. I find at this age damn near anything will do and, in that regard, standing upright is good for starters. And besides keeping me in spending money my every morning recycle pick up from seven places nearby has really been the ticket.

Most interesting to date is that a week ago I started the quest to lose weight again. Now let’s see if I can come up with the resolve to do it. From my present 260lb weight (the heaviest I have ever been) it will take a 20lb loss to allow me to crow but then will come the real challenge to get down to 235lbs. Being married to a gourmet cook is certainly an obstacle, but she certainly would rather sleep with a old dog than sleep with an old hog wouldn’t she? So the onus is on her too.

I’m trying to get the nerve up to tell her. Or better yet, you tell her.

(Editor's note: Frank Sullivan has written a book called "Life is More than 9 Innings - Memories of a Boston Red Sox Pitcher," a unique collection of stories covering a lifetime of memories. Frank's 10-year Major League Baseball career is the source of a fascinating insider’s look at the sport of baseball and some of the legendary players of the ‘50s and ‘60s including Ted Williams, Yogi Berra, Sam White and many more.   As the title implies, there are many more stories to be told including his early years growing up in California, Army service during the Korean War, and 43 years of life in Hawaii on the island of Kauai.

Put together in a very readable short story format, each account stands on its own as a captivating tale told by a master storyteller. Along with its wonderful collection of photographs, the book is a storehouse of memories to be savored and enjoyed by sports fans and casual readers alike.

Frank Sullivan is a Red Sox Hall of Fame pitcher who is now on the way to becoming a Hall of Fame storyteller. This delightful book not only covers his professional career and many of the great players of that era but also has many delightful human interest tales of life away from the playing fields.

"He details the ups and downs of a baseball career at a time when there wasn’t expansion of the leagues and free agency was not a part of baseball terminology. A really enjoyable, fun book for everyone."
— Dick Bresciani, Vice President, Boston Red Sox 

Copies of the book can be ordered directly from Frank autographed or with a salutation for $23, including shipping.  

Order from:
Frank Sullivan
P.O. Box 1873
Lihue, HI 96766