Ubiquitous mistakes drive word lover crazy

RIMSHOTS
Ubiquitous mistakes drive word lover crazy

By Noble Collins
Gazette Columnist

A friend of mine says that I use the word "hubris" too much. I asked him to define “too much.”

He answered, "More than once in a lifetime." I may not agree, but I'll go ahead and get the subscription to The Weekly Reader renewed for his birthday anyway. Friends should be allowed to speak freely.

I confess to enjoying words. Not as much as a full fledged etymologist, mind you, but capturing an illusive one now and again and penning it in my notebook is very satisfying.

Precise meanings and clearly articulated thoughts appeal to me. An attorney friend once explained the importance of “The truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth” when giving testimony.

Each of the phrases compliments and augments the other in the same way that “cut, clarity and color” are used to determine the value of a diamond. Each individual quality must be present to establish the worth of the whole.

English has become a universal language for many reasons. One of the most important is that it combines words and phrases from almost all the world's languages, starting with Greek and Latin. To that base, you add French, German, Italian, Spanish – words, phrases and idioms from around the world.

Then you use them like condiments at the great feast called English, and, if you are a true gourmet, you particularly savor the language spoken in the United Kingdom. There, sentences are crisp, precise, and usually charming. One of my favorite words, used there rather commonly but seldom anywhere else, is “daunting.” Just the sound of that word expresses its unmistakable meaning, I think.

“Rather daunting weather for sailing, eh, Reginald?”
“I suppose so, Dunbar, with the hurricane and all.”

Ever watch the amazing youngsters at the National Spelling Bee? Listen as they ask for the root of a word and for its use in a sentence:

“Well, Sammy, the root is from archaic Sumerian, third dynasty, where it meant strong odor.”

“Would you use it in a sentence, please?

“Of course. – ‘Please roll down the window Frank, this methaneobnoxicus is peeling the false wood from the dashboard.’”

“O.K. M – E – T . . .

And, of course, they get it right.

BUT, do they really appreciate the full power and seasoning of the words they so easily spell? I hope so. Another of my favorites is “nuance,” which wraps around a word or phrase and wrings every drop of meaning from it.

I want to be sure that I completely understand the meaning of a writer or speaker. His or her true thoughts deserve accuracy in my mind, and I find that I pay far more attention to a speaker if who appears to know and is able to express what he or she is talking about. “Gibberish” is another of those words where the mere sound fully expresses the meaning.

In the beginning, we most likely communicated with each other through grunts or other sounds. As time went by, we added in some gestures and perhaps did some play acting, somewhat like “Charades.” The desire to communicate must have been a primal urge, linked with advancement in all the other areas. Somehow, we slowly connected patterns of thought, intent, desire, or information transfer from one brain to another. Like a child learning to speak, this must have taken a while. Quite possibly, it was more like generations of children, each learning a new word.

By now, I think most of the vast potential quarry of words has been mined. The Oxford Dictionary adds a few new ones from time to time, mostly from colloquial utterances accepted into the mainstream because of perceived “charm” or “color.” New scientific words are added, also, although they are far less used.

Language continues to evolve, but I think we are pretty much fully equipped at present with a full arsenal of communication tools. The problem is in learning how to use them properly and effectively. Also, knowing how to speak does not always guarantee knowing how to listen.

Diplomats know the great importance of conveying thoughts with precise accuracy. Even so, a word or a phrase gets misunderstood or taken out of context occasionally, and wars have been known to start because of this.

Not long ago, President Bush used the word “Crusade” with regard to taking over Iraq. To the Turks especially, and many other Muslim tribes, this brought an unpleasant reminder of other historical invasions in this part of the world. It didn't win us any allies at the time, and later Mr. Bush had to spend more time than he wanted explaining his meaning. I don't think he convinced many people.

In the 1960's we almost engaged in nuclear war over a “quarantine” of Russian ships. If the word “blockade” had been chosen, things might very well have turned out differently.

Perhaps the biggest detriment to using rhetoric in our daily lives is that so much has been simplified for us. No one pulls up to the drive-in window at McDonald's and says, “Please serve me a ground beef patty cooked and placed upon a toasted bun. Add a small portion of ketchup, mustard and mayonaise, and a few sliced pickles, please – oh, and some potatoes cut into rectangular sticks and cooked in hot oil.” Well, maybe if you saw the movie, “Sling Blade.”

We substitute parlance for rhetoric because it's quicker and easier and because English class was boring, while science lab was fun.

“Turn off the Bunsen Burner, boys, something is methaneobnoxicus in here!”

“Dammit, Roy, you messin' with the sulfur dixide again, or did you just have beans for lunch?”

“Open a window, Frank.”

And all the while, poor Miss Norman was trying to explain the value in diagramming a sentence.

Men expect each other to get to the point rather quickly and get on with whatever it is that brings them together. Women don't seem to share the same objective. They appear to go to quite the other extreme, substituting elaboration for description. Women like big words. This is why I majored in English rather than become just another big time jock.

Sooner or later, we all seem to accommodate to each other, though. Getting along requires it. I am not allowed to be too pretentious, and I enjoy pointing out the misuse of “too, to, or two” to my e-mail buddies. I've stopped trying with “your and you're” or “their and there.” The mistakes are ubiquitous.