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Saturday, April 5, 2025

Trump tariffed the world—but not Russia

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Face masks depicting then-incoming U.S. President Donald Trump, left, and Russian dictator Vladimir Putin hang for sale at a shop in St. Petersburg, Russia, on Jan. 20, 2025.  If only these two tyrants were as dead as their masks.

Penguins slapped with tariffs, but not his bosom bro Putin

As President Donald Trump bragged about slapping tariffs on more than 180 countries and territories, there was one conspicuous omission: Russia. 

It was yet another example of Trump’s bizarre obsession with Russian strongman Vladimir Putin as well as his disdain for Ukraine, which got slapped with a 10% tariff. News outlet NOTUS reported that a White House official said that “Russia is not on this list because sanctions from the Ukraine war have already rendered trade between the two countries as zero.”

That was a weird explanation, given that Trump’s list included the “countries” of Heard Island and McDonald Islands, which are uninhabited by humans, though lots of penguins live there. Not that anyone is fooled by the penguin effort to undermine America …


In addition, that White House official flat-out lied to NOTUS. The U.S. does conduct some trade with Russia—and far more than some of the countries on its tariff list, like Norfolk Island, which had $655,000 in exports to the U.S. in 2023.

Last year, the U.S. traded an estimated $3.5 billion of goods with Russia, according to the Office of the U.S. Trade Representative. “U.S. goods exports to Russia in 2024 were $526.1 million,” the office says on its website. “The U.S. goods trade deficit with Russia was $2.5 billion in 2024.” 

Remember, Trump stupidly sees any trade deficit as a country screwing the U.S. And yet, while Russia has a fairly significant one, Trump has remained mum. 

So what is Russia sending to the U.S.? No. 1 on the list: fertilizer. 

And therein lies the likely reason Trump exempted Russia. 

American farmers get the vast majority of their potash fertilizer from Canada, which the U.S. has now heavily tariffed. Watch him try to replace Canadian potash with Russian fertilizer to both mollify furious farmers and their Republican legislators, and do a solid for his pal Putin.

There's gotta be a reason: Sometimes gays pretend to be anti-gay to cover up their gayness.

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